belgium

so here i am. le plat pays. flanders. belgium. the journeys in and out interwoven and unending. new landscapes, new platforms, new and old languages. things are never really the same. and neither are we. yet...

In the end at the beginning....

... there was not so much to say.
After a deep breath in San fansisco, including a delicious experience in cafe Gratitude (raw food), i made my way back to the bush. Beautiful bushes. Big -but not as big as before- trees and greenery, most amazing wooden houses decorating Mountain Tamalpais. Mill Valley hosted me kindly on a couch. I got the chance to work with Anna Halprin. I got on a plane and left for now the States. Tracing my steps back to Canada.

a mathematical perspective on dimensions of life

haha.

ok, here it is:

see from the one-line, my life sucks: i make little progress on the linear continuum of carreer and steady, single-focused progress in life.
seen in two dimensions of more alternative options, i wriggel a nonsense pattern of loose ends in a maybe creative pattern through life.
with diving into a new perspective of soulful purpose, the third dimension unravels a picture in the way these childrens pictures work: as i travel through time and space, seemingly random points get connected untill suddenly the image appears..... my image?

there's probably more than three. in thirty-one more years i can tell you more about that.

news

reading the flemish newspaper online, i was quite amazed to find the faces of my old classmates in the Icelandic arts academy in there..... on this cute 'dancing for iceland' video: inspiredbyIceland.com
have a look at it, it's funny. what a way of having worlds come together :-).

there seems to be a lot of world-news: the oil disaster, Israel,.... and also a lot of pain that doesn't reach eyes and ears. yet also happiness, hidden and unfolding, all over the place.
not so much to say from my side. see you soon.
with a beating heart,
S.

pictures! big trees! with me!

http://littleredtent.net/BigTrees/

pictures taken by my host Edie Howe in Yosemite national park, in the Mariposa Grove with the giant sequoia's. thanks Edie!

san fran

so here am i. my first camping adventure brought me to ojai, a remote community in the mountains where i camped in the garden, found myself embraced by the howling of coyotes and the dances of snakes. my second trip into the wild brought me to yosemite national park. a city in a park, actually. camping between almost only-rock climbers gave me the feeling of being misplaced yet sleeping on mother earth made me feel so much home. had delightful conversations and company with and from delightful climbers, a bunch of nice young men. saw bears. climbed steep mountains. so here i am. san fransisco. humans are weird, getting together in cities like this.

ps somebody knows if there are any elections in belgium soon?

moving on

and again, not sure how frequently i will visit cyberspaces. am going for a trainride and some camping.... still california............ talk to you later.
sarah

little news

i'm planning to go camping for some days... not sure if i'll have access to the internet there. have it good until i'm back.
sarah

ps i never owned so many toothpastes: 5!

shoes

i guess wearing vibram-shoes is like walking a dog or carrying a newborn baby: it makes people talk to you. fascinated. wondering. like this cute (!) old lady who wouldnt stop saying how cute i was :-). well, i am. :-)

thankyou

so this is it. birthday in one of the States. funny, because most of the people i know are sound asleep by now... leaving a quiet night for me alone..........
i spent almost the whole day in the water. first surfing, with (again) cold water, but this time bigger waves and hundreds of BIG jellyfish (the body as big as a persons head). we survived. it was fun actually.
treated myself on some meat.
then more soaking ~in hot water~, and swimming.
and then the sun was gone and left the sky in a mysterious colour that seemed blue but was grey, a foggy blanket. so time for a blanket and a sofa. for some cyberspace birthday.
thanks for all the sweet messages.
a stretched-out birthday, over time-zones and space.
so i'm 31 now. let's see what this will bring.
love
S

'Are you raw?'

.... before this travel, i wouldn't have quite understood the above question..... do you? .... :-) it means, 'are you eating raw food?' :-)
california seems to be the place to be for some new things on earth....
some new things in my young life over here:

SURFING!

five finger shoes (see vibramfivefingers.com: i bought the womans - sprint- chilli colour)

making my own almond milk
eu...

this is pure hollidays, spent in the mountains, on the beach and in between that: in town.
people are kind and open, generally. some crazy homeless people dwell on the streets, they look a bit like old hippies who have had their glorious times a long time ago......

the weather is mostly sunny. which is great. i sometimes look northeast and wonder how iceland is doing. i'm feeling mixed about not being there during the eruption-time..... a chance to see and feel nature's powerful moments..... like the ocean here, which is very cold by the way...... and nature is vast.....

enjoy spring. hope you get lots of spring and blossoming!
sarah -

another list, because i like it

vehicles i am using on my trip:

feet, first and foremost
bicycles: a beach cruiser and a koersfiets (racing bike)
car

thanks to all the owners who borrow me their transport means

wild companions

wild animals i have seen on my trip so far:
DOLPHINS! yesterday in Santa Barbara
deer! in SB and Northern Ontario
a very big fox, am still doubting if it was one, who seemed totally comfortable with my presence in the bushes (i must have looked like an animal, peeing on the earth)
rackoons (yes, in downtown toronto) (what is that in t nederlands?)
all kinds of birds, from hawks or eagles (not sure) to brightly coloured ones
squirrels! tons of them!
rabbits
small creature crawling out of the earth, like a mouse but bigger
bugs and insects off course

i'm sure many more wild animals have seen me though.

Santa Barbara day one

so here i am. while i was flying to San Fransisco i realised how i slowly drift further and further away from Belgium..... Iceland-Canada-California-.... like a bird hopping from branch to branch, suddenly discovering the great height it's on. the thing is: if i'd keep on travelling the same direction, the same way.... it would bring me right back home! .... amazing. exploration and expansion into home.
i was happy to see the wrinkles in the skin of the earth again.... - once closer to the surface i recognised them as mountains. in a way this place has familiarities with my home in Iceland: mountains and sea - apart from this: no warm winds, no palm trees and beach vibes in the north. (well yes, beach vibes even in december in Iceland, for the brave ones.... i consider myself brave :-).)

conquering the Fortress America wasn't the easiest thing. i was thinking how remarquable it is that the 'New World' once, even not so long ago, welcomed so many different people from all over the world (or almost).... it's culture is even the fruit of it.... to turn nowadays in a place where the border people treat foreigners with suspicion and distrust. weird. both my words and my luggage got turned inside out. again and again. but i made it. i fought the battle.

so let's exchange my winter outfit for a summer one. i have been looking forward to the blossoming of spring, but i seem to have missed that part; i skipped a season in a matter of hours. flying from Toronto where the trees are still bare..... here they have a deep summer green as dresses! i realise my connection with spring, my birth season: its blossoming and flowers matches the fresh colours i love to wear and have around me.

ok, for now,
cheers,
S.

quiz!

so i have been wondering.....

my last six birthdays i celebrated chronologically in:

India

Belgium!

Denmark

Sweden

Finland

Iceland

so the question is, and i'm curious myself: where on earth will i turn 31?

guess and write me!

(you get a tip: it's happening on the 25th of next month, april, so a month from here, now, and about four months from the start of the Big Trip)

ps isn't it time for a tropical birthday?? (maybe South-America, Andrea?)

pps i had to do something to make you write me back ;-)

Sudden Move to the Sun

Dames en Heren, appels en peren................

de winter is terug in 't land maar dat kan me niet deren

(jaja, Ijslandse temperaturen)

because...

i'm flying to California on tuesday! Jippah!

I'm going to stay with a wonderful lady ~whom i haven't met yet~ in Santa Barbara,

and from there i will see

and from there i will fly

and from there i will hike and bike and say hi to the West of this continent.

A sudden though joyful decision.

Last year i wrote a paper for the Arts Academy in Iceland, talking about my love for water, especially the sea, and how i very often end up living close to the sea. Up till now this has been mostly the Atlantic Ocean, and a little bit of the Indian one. Now i will greet the Pacific.

I'll keep you posted.

Happy Eastern, Passover and all there is to celebrate.

x

Sarah

to travel, what's in a name

'A good traveller has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving' (Lao Tzu)

Good morning everyone.
i just read this quote on a site i found by just hopping from one to the other, following the tread of inspiring words and views on life. isn't that the very same pattern of life itself..... like a drop of water carving its way through sand and earth and moss and stones, a journey of sinking in and surfacing.... so are we pulled forward by gravity and longing to move and be.... somewhere, somehow. i don't know if there is many more 'outlines' for what human life is 'supposed' to be...?

reading some of the above mentioned sites, i started connecting with my own fire, a desire to put in words what i have felt for such a long part of my life. i am very skilled in adapting myself. i remember, as a child, the sensation of observing how people act, and how i would naturally blend in with them.... which made it possible for me to be part of different groups without really belonging to just one. a cameleon-skill.
part of my life for the last years has been to let these different 'flows' of focus slowly converge, so i can gather myself in something like a river, with a more steady course. i am still pretty good in translating myself into well-known territory, adapting the picture of my inner experience into a language that is recognisable and 'fits in'. which is a skill again.

but now i see into my life and realise that i can be me. i don't have to effort to pour my substance into a well-known shape.

i'm a nomad in my very own way. my longing is for the Source. i have never known where i'm going but i learned how to walk by putting one foot after the other on the ground. i have no map but an inner resonance of subtle knowing is my compass. every question is a gate to new land, broader views and deeper experiences. what is it to be human, what is possible in a human life? i think that there are very very very few limits to who we are and what is possible. but the way is a slow way. even though we might travel with the speed of a rollercoaster, still it takes many years to make some small distance in the universe.

there seems to be a mainstream lifestyle, and alternative ways. but often i feel i fall even between the gaps of both. because the so-called alternatives are already some kind of agreed upon trails, they have some kinds of route marking and 'supposed to be's'. at least from where i am looking. walking without trail is the biggest relief for me. 'without' in the sense of: this is me, little drop of water carving my way, simply by surrendering to gravity and longing. to the deepest discovered layer of longing, in every moment. it's like mining: there is always deeper to go. i say simply because it's so simple, yet, i have felt that it takes a massive work and awareness of un-learning and longing to move. i have felt that, at least for some years during my twenties, i spent a lot of time on the un-learning of what i don't need. i feel that we're born with the major amount of potential that we really need as a human: creativity, awareness and motivation are maybe major skills to be fed and stimulated by our grown-up surroundings. it's like software development without stuffing the 'computer' with endless information on the way. let's add discernment, and connection. and off course there is practical skills to be learned.

i have felt for the last years that my home is where i am. so yes, i am travelling. but i'm living here. not to come, see and conquer. but because this is my place to be, blend, watch and take part. for now. i'm merely living. surfing Life, following Life, learning from Life.

i read in a Zen-book that we are just like a door in the universe. when we breathe, the door opens one way and then the other, over and over again. one way, the other. one way, the other.

moving slowly through the rabbit hole,
sincerely,
Sarah

ps let yourself be inspired. on http://www.soultravelers3.com/ you can find many links to similar sites of people shaping their lives in their own way. just like each of us.

love.

a beautiful little fairytale to see

http://www.infuzionweb.com/2008/12/12/you-deserve-to-smile

~ my fairytale has a castle, snakes and a prince, ladies and gentlemen;
it's playing day and night
in darkness and sunlight;
it's about a hero, a woman, even though we don't know yet if she is,
and her adventures in a far away country,
in dreams of wake and sleep.
she wonders about home
as she's fighting dragons in deep dark forests
even though the stars tell her to rest;
she's travelling many miles a day to find the grail;
she's a child and a queen,
she's
me ~
S

(time)travelling

sometimes i think seriously that time tricks me. like last night. i took a short walk in dark Toronto. i was stunned to see a full moon in a clear sky. maybe it's my memory that tricks me when i think i saw a small crescent moon just a couple of days ago.....!

it must have something to do with my pace of living. animals who move slowly, like a snail, appear to have a sense of time going really fast. animals who move fast have the opposite impression. so this slow pace of travelling, having the colour of retreat or hibernation, makes time spin out of hand for me.

speaking of colours.

speaking of spinning.

Angela will soon be in Belgium again.

Andrea is in Argentina.

Diego is in Bergen.

Ane in Egypt.

Elisabeth in Norway.

people moving around on the blackboard of space.

a movement of golden children around the globe. is the world shrinking?

love.

lailatov. sleepwell.

Special Sunday

it's valentine. it's chinese new year. it's olympic games. it's sunday and a day like another. well yes and no. it's super gray when looking up into the sky. there is a flemish person living under the floor where i'm sitting on (just in another flat, not in a hole in the ground). there is some silence beyond the humming of the fridge. you may wonder where i am and what i'm doing. i guess that when a certain amount of home-ness is attained, there is less obvious reasons for describing life in all it's actions and views, as if the membrane between the city and the visitor melts away... and i find myself in some kind of daily life here. so yes, Toronto. so yes, i'm well. 'no news is good news', is a flemish saying. i don't know if that's generally true but in this case it is.
so what is the recepy for this sunday evening? maybe finding a good balance between travelling and being home. diving deep enough to find both the steadiness to walk and the ease of flexibility. it's the journey of a small child, and in a way of all of us.
cheers, and wishing each of you a wonderful celebration of life in it's very magnificent way.
Sarah

Toronto tripping. by full moon.

sometimes for movement to be noticed, there has to be silence.
refraining from action to plunge into the deep seas of collapse and storm.
in the gaps. between the blinking of eyes. between the yesness of joints. between words. again.
the without becomes full.
the endless well of presence that is mirrored and reflects back in my seeing of you.
i dream. i fall. i fly again.

the holy trinity of movement, breath and sound.
and the love in between.

Sarah

OhMmmmAh!

beautiful people in this world.
what an amazing experience did i have tonight. being carried by love. that's how it felt.
graceKaya saw me dance last week and invited me to do a little dance in her cd release show. she gathered a bunch of most beautiful people and sprinkled magic vibes over our heads and under our feet, and there we took off. grace has this amazing quality of making friends with the audience, from the heart, she is mostly skilled in words, moves and smiles. the dancers and musicians were so radiant, each one of them. thankyou all for sharing with me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=StItGacJxq8&feature=related
and here you can see a video of a radio-interview
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udwGaw18pmI

i was dancing on wonderful words of alanis morisette, talking about her music, life and inspiration.
it's funny, for years i have been having ideas about dancing on text, and i am doing this now, two weeks in a row.....

thankyou Universe, Oneness, Soulful me for this alignment of beauty on my travels, and the flow of delightful encounters i may be part of. thankyou Angela and Bryan for sharing your space with me, still and again.

blessings and gratitude,
from the heart,
SaraH.
on angels' wings

Incomplete. but finally some answer on the question: what music do you like?

this is some music that accompanied me in the woods, and that i love to hear waving into my ears. the first one is iron and wine. the second one bon iver. i like bon ivers music more and more; to me it is somehow connected to landscapes i'm living in. (just click on the link or copy it to open.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Kh09MuIfIU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePatJIwB-sI&NR=1

off course there is more.
i would like to put hundred songs. regina spektor. ane brun. pergolesi's stabat mater. sufjan stevens. some gypsie and some reggae. throatsinging. buddhist monks. mari boine. cocorosie. overtones. antony. leonard. sigur ros! nature and silence. voices.

well, two more then. women.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLx9dudmIq4&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVh3WQtx_pw&feature=related

it's a tease.
SaarAh
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DY1pcEtHI_w
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCkK1AqsIAI&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNAKH4KdRY0

strawberry city

i bought a hat that makes me look like a strawberry. well it would for sure if it would be red and pink.

a me-treat.
X

dances!

dear you, wonderful reader of this net of words. welcome to the day.
days are dancing these days. dancing on earth's skin. sounding into space and pulling it back to earth by bouncing feet.

oh yes. more concrete.

although the city makes me a bit nervous after being in the total silence of the woods, there is a beautiful creativity blossoming in the little dance communities here, so i am happy to be immersed in that for a little while. joining some jams, classes, improvisations with movement and sound. angela, nilan and me did a beautiful and raw little piece yesterday on a dance-music-event called coexistence.
as relaxed i was in the woods, so busy have i been since i came back :-).

well,
"Those who dance are considered insane by those who can’t hear the music."-George Carlin
"One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star."-Friedrich Nietzsche
"Everything in the universe has rhythm. Everything dances."-Maya Angelou
for your inspiration.

besides all of this, it is extremely warm here. it is even not freezing. instead of over a meter snow, there was only about 30 to 20 cm of snow in the north. what's going on?

chaos. love. dance.
sarah

little snow left

6 in the morning is probably a good hour to walk the streets of Toronto and find them deserted, apart from eager taxi-drivers and shadows falling over their own feet. so i'm back where i came from, planning to do what was planned and then let all plans drift and find my path by stars, guts and wolf tracks.
yours, into bed,
Sarah

snow-white-days

days in the north are stretched out under a not that thick layer of snow ~ covered with a patchwork of animal tracks ~ guarded by bright sunny skies and nights packed with stars.

a place to be.

i came into town for the day.

Mat and Annie are wonderful hosts. i'm feeling easily at home in Mat's beautiful house. making friends with Sula the dog and Minou the cat.

some hours a day: exposure to cold air ~ evenings: food, talks and cosiness.

got a wonderful 9-hour nightride with Marguerite up here. managed not to fall asleep, barely :-), thanks to the interesting conversations.

the town we drove into today is called Sault Ste Marie. so you can locate me :-).

back to the forest tonight.
Sarah

North. into the bush.

what a writefull night. well i thought i might let you know that by tomorrow ~which is tuesday~ evening i will be driving up north, to Angela's birthgrounds (more precisely: growing up grounds). i'll get a ride of one of her friends and stay with another one for some time. i'll be in a place with a lot of forests, in fact only forests, i am told, and without virtual connections. so be warned: no news for as long as it delights me to stay there :-).

be well, and have a wonderful january~journey.

Sarah

different textures of gold

it would be nice to write about the liquid flow of emptiness between moments of play. about a soul's journey in a landscape of bodies. a story of textures and colours and songs, and a lot of eyes-to-eyes...... let's keep the story written in the common space of thoughts, and beyond, in the underwaterworld of dreaming.

yours.

different textures of cold

frozen waterpipes in the house make a showerless day. the temperature dropped over one night from around zero to minus sixteen. i walked over to the lake in an attempt to make my watermatch of the day. lake, read: sea. more or less endless water. the next object to be called cold was my nose. the air cold and wet, had a slippery feel to it, like the skin of a fish.
watched some wonderful documentaries about the Inuit.

some people make new years resolutions and apparently many of them have 'doing something new' as a favourite. despite a mind free from resolutions, i did for every day in 2010 something 'new'.
day one, walking the wrong way in a canadian forest, followed by a hitchhikers ride on a snowscooter.
day two, circling for one hour clockwise on ice. skating under a near-full blue moon.

texture of warmth to come: bed.
goodnight, and magic morning.
your canadian warrior on horseback,
S